Treasures of Darkness
"I will go before you and make the rough patches smooth; I will shatter the doors of bronze and cut through their iron bars. I will give you the treasures of darkness and hidden wealth in secret places, so that you will know that it is I, The Lord, the God of Israel, who calls you by your name." Isaiah 45:2
This was a promise given to me by Papa God the week before I came to Moz in September. He promised me that He would go before me and lay out the path during Harvest School, then He will give me the treasures of the darkness in Tete. Our Shekinah boys are my treasures of darkness.
We don't have the boys home built yet because of finances, but it's going to be built soon in the Name of Jesus! Nick, Marlene, and I are living in a small house that we are renting until we get the home built on our ministries land. We can't legally allow the boys to live here with us because of social services and we don't have all of their documents and things yet. So until we get the home built for them, they are continuing to live on the streets in the city.
The place where the boys are living right now is the lowest and darkest place I've ever been to. While the Harvest School team was here for two weeks, we had the honor of staying one night with the boys in the dump where they live in the city. They had spent the night with us at our house one night when it was raining, so we wanted to spend the night with them to see what their conditions are really like all the time. We wanted to see the reality of it. My reason in going was that I needed to see how their lives are really like so that I know how to pray for and love them even more as their sister. I needed to see the reality of it so I could know the urgency of getting their home built.
Nick and Marlene did not stay with us because they wanted to see how the boys would take care of us and treat us when they weren't around. They wanted to see the fruit of all they have been pouring into these boys. We thought it was going to be difficult without nick and mar there because they both speak Portuguese and none of us do. The boys don't speak any English at all so we were worried about the language barrier. Some of the people on the team were worried about sleeping in a dump in the middle of the city while there are parties and drinking and fights breaking out just across the street.
I went into this with no fear at all. I was completely trusting that my Papa was going to take care of me. If he takes care of my brothers in the street and if they can survive sleeping there, then I can too. As soon as we pulled up, we just saw this huge dump with piles and piles of rubble and trash and rocks. The boys all came running up to us, they were so excited and blown away that we would actually want to come spend the night with them. They all laughed at first cause they didn't think we would actually stay the whole night. We said "well we are all family! You spent the night with us the other night, so we want to spend the night with you now!" Nick and Mar told them to take care of us and protect us cause we are their family. They said ok we will!!!
I can't begin to describe to you the smell that was everywhere and the millions of flies all over everything. It definitely was not the most comfortable place to sleep, but I wasn't complaining. ;) When we got there, the boys immediately started making beds for all of us out of rocks and rubble, they were moving huge pieces of cement and arranging them all for us to sleep in the same area and be comfortable. Then Michael, who is one of the oldest ones (17) and kind of the leader of the rest, went and grabbed all of the old sheets and mats that they had and he gave them all to us to sleep with because it was cold that night. He was making sure that everyone was as comfortable as they could be.
After making the beds, they began to cook some fish that nick and mar bought them for dinner. The way they cook is by putting the food in a really old and nasty cooking pot on top of a little fire that they feed with plastic and anything else they can find laying around. We already ate before we came so we told them not to cook any for us. After it was all cooked up, they washed all of our hands and began serving us first. We were like no we already ate! You guys eat it all! They said no and insisted that we eat first. They wouldn't even touch their food until we all had a little bit. This is a huge transformation that's taken place in them. When Nick and Mar first started ministering to them and feeding them, they would all fight over the food and attack it like vultures to make sure they got the most. Now they are serving us first and not eating until we get some?! That's only by Jesus! :)
Since we didn't have a translator, I was trying to remember all the portuguese that I know from being here two times and trying to learn it in Pemba during HS. I seriously only know very few words and sentences, but somehow Jesus opened my tongue to speak a little but more Portuguese and I became the translator that night. So crazy!
When it was time for bed, there were 5 of us girls all squished together on one of the pieces of cement. I was curled up in a ball on the top corner trying to stay warm because I was the only one who didn't get a blanket. It had rained earlier that day so the temperatures cooled down a lot, plus we were on top of a big hill with the wind. Michael and a few other boys were sleeping on the bed next to us and Michael kept asking me if I was cold. I told him I was a little cold but I'll be fine! After the third time he asked me, he stood up and took the little sheet that he had, off of himself and laid it on me. I almost started crying right there. The fact that he even thought about me being too cold, then him actually taking his little old dirty sheet off of himself to give to me, was so overwhelming to me. It was such a demonstration of what love looks like.
I didn't sleep much because it was cold and tons of people were in the street right next to us drinking and partying the entire night. But we all felt so safe and could literally feel Gods presence and the Holy Spirit with us the entire night. The boys were so cute, they took turns staying awake and watching us to protect us.
I was expecting to be able to love on the boys even more and bless them and be a part of their life for one night, but coming out of it, I think I received more love and blessings from them. It's so amazing to see the fruit of what Nick and Mar have planted in them. Yes, the enemy still tempts them to go back to their old ways of stealing, drinking, and smoking, and yes the still give in to the temptations sometimes. But the transformation that's happening in their hearts is incredible. They are so much more happy and full of life than when I was here in June. I can't wait for the day when they completely fall in love with Jesus and Papa God captures them in His arms. That will be the day when they are totally set free.
It's been hard trying to minister to them the past few days because of stupid choices they are making and going back to their old ways and acting like they aren't getting it, but Papa gave me such a clear word when we were in the car the other day. He said "how bad do you want them, how bad do you want them, how bad do you want them? You are called to love them no matter what, love them through it all no matter what stupid choices they make. I am so jealous for their souls just like I'm jealous for yours. Will you love them with my unconditional love no matter how hard it gets?" YES JESUS they are my treasures in the darkness!!!!
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Transition
Harvest School changed my life forever. I received so much breakthrough and revelation of who I am in Christ. I realized that I am Papa Gods's favorite daughter and he loves me more than anything and he's so incredibly jealous for me. I was able to lay my life completely down and say yes to Him and follow His will for my life. I received my DNA as His child and learned so much about what its like and how to be in the mission field.
I fell in love with Pemba all over again in those three months while I was there. Jesus really connected me even deeper with some of my Mozambican friends there and I became super close with a few of the Harvest students as well. I got used to the holy spirit bubble that Pemba is and fell in love with it. When it was time to leave and come to Tete, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be because I wasn't expecting to love Pemba and miss my friends there so much. It was hard coming to Tete at first, but I still had confirmation and peace that I was supposed to come here.
Transition is never easy but it's sometimes very necessary. Especially when you are following the Lords lead. The first few days here I really had to cling onto the promises He gave me that Im supposed to be here, cause it was a difficult change for me, I'm not going to lie. But the more time I've spent here and the more I get to know Nick and Marlene and the boys, the more peace I have and the more at home I feel. I honestly couldn't imagine being anywhere else in the world than right here right now. Papa keeps breaking my heart more and more everyday for these precious boys that we are loving and building a home for.
I seriously feel so blessed that I get to live here for almost 3 months and be a part of this family and gain 25 more brothers. This is the time where I put into practice all that I learned and experienced in Pemba during Harvest School. This is the reality of a missionaries life that I'm living for a few months. It's definitely already been challenging but I know it's going to be so worth it all.
It's absolutely crazy for me to think that Papa God chose me to come alongside Pioneer61 and be their first intern and love these boys and be an assistant to Nick and Marlene. Who am I that He would chose me to be His hands and feet? He called me and I said YES and I'm so happy that I did! I've learned so much being here already and I have even more to learn.
I'll post more specific stories and prayer requests as I get time to write. But for now, just know that I'm exactly where I'm so supposed to be and Papa is stretching me and molding me into His little missionary in the dirt. :)
I fell in love with Pemba all over again in those three months while I was there. Jesus really connected me even deeper with some of my Mozambican friends there and I became super close with a few of the Harvest students as well. I got used to the holy spirit bubble that Pemba is and fell in love with it. When it was time to leave and come to Tete, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be because I wasn't expecting to love Pemba and miss my friends there so much. It was hard coming to Tete at first, but I still had confirmation and peace that I was supposed to come here.
Transition is never easy but it's sometimes very necessary. Especially when you are following the Lords lead. The first few days here I really had to cling onto the promises He gave me that Im supposed to be here, cause it was a difficult change for me, I'm not going to lie. But the more time I've spent here and the more I get to know Nick and Marlene and the boys, the more peace I have and the more at home I feel. I honestly couldn't imagine being anywhere else in the world than right here right now. Papa keeps breaking my heart more and more everyday for these precious boys that we are loving and building a home for.
I seriously feel so blessed that I get to live here for almost 3 months and be a part of this family and gain 25 more brothers. This is the time where I put into practice all that I learned and experienced in Pemba during Harvest School. This is the reality of a missionaries life that I'm living for a few months. It's definitely already been challenging but I know it's going to be so worth it all.
It's absolutely crazy for me to think that Papa God chose me to come alongside Pioneer61 and be their first intern and love these boys and be an assistant to Nick and Marlene. Who am I that He would chose me to be His hands and feet? He called me and I said YES and I'm so happy that I did! I've learned so much being here already and I have even more to learn.
I'll post more specific stories and prayer requests as I get time to write. But for now, just know that I'm exactly where I'm so supposed to be and Papa is stretching me and molding me into His little missionary in the dirt. :)
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Fire and Baptism
The main theme of my life leading up to harvest school was about me being a living sacrifice for God. Laying my whole life down for Him and His glory. This whole time has been incredible and fun but I hadn't really had the huge breakthrough moment that I thought I would have early on. That all changed this week...
There is a guy here from Georgia that has been leading worship for us in all of our classes. He is seriously anointed and the Holy Spirit breaks out every time he leads worship. The first night that he got here, we had a special worship service with him in the church building and I was praying with my housemate/sister, Lorraine, and God gave me an incredible vision for both of us. This is the moment that started my breakthrough.
In the vision He showed me that he wants to completely set me on fire and burn up everything about me that's not of Him. (This vision was for me and Lorraine together.) It was like he was literally wanting to set us on fire and burn it all up. Then he poured His living water on us and let the fire burn out. The water was just completely submerging us and refreshing us. After the water, He reset His Holy Spirit fire on top of the water. The water was keeping the fire a flame and the fire was keeping the water alive and that's what was keeping us alive. He so clearly showed me that He wants the burning process to be the sacrifice part. He wants me to completely die to myself so that He can then come and pour His living water and reset His fire and make us alive again. Right after I had this vision, the worship leader started singing in the spirit about the fire.
A process is something that takes time. This burning process is going to take some time. He is so incredibly jealous for us that He wants every single fiber of our being to belong completely to Him. He's willing to burn us of ourselves so that we can belong to Him and Him alone. I want His fierce and fiery love to consume everything about me. His living water is what I want flowing in and through me at all times. I want to be a river for Him and drink from His well. Imagine the living water and the Holy Spirit fire flowing and burning together in one person. I have no idea what that even looks like but that's what He told me He's doing in me and Lorraine. I know it's going to be amazing. It already blows my mind to think about the water keeping the fire burning and the fire keeping the water alive and both of them keeping us alive. That picture is forever in my mind and heart.
After 10 days of the burning process, the living water broke through and put the fire out! I felt him submerging me in his new life and making me alive again. The last week of Harvest School, we had a baptism day. I really felt the Holy Spirit telling me that He wanted to baptize me and he wanted me to symbolize myself laying down my own life, dying to myself, being completely submerged in His living water, and being raised back up in His new life. I've already been baptized when I was younger but I didn't fully understand what it meant. Now that I've totally surrendered myself to Him, I really felt like I needed to show and symbolize what I did in my heart. So that's what I did! I was baptized in the Indian ocean by the Holy Spirit and I've been forever changed.
There is a guy here from Georgia that has been leading worship for us in all of our classes. He is seriously anointed and the Holy Spirit breaks out every time he leads worship. The first night that he got here, we had a special worship service with him in the church building and I was praying with my housemate/sister, Lorraine, and God gave me an incredible vision for both of us. This is the moment that started my breakthrough.
In the vision He showed me that he wants to completely set me on fire and burn up everything about me that's not of Him. (This vision was for me and Lorraine together.) It was like he was literally wanting to set us on fire and burn it all up. Then he poured His living water on us and let the fire burn out. The water was just completely submerging us and refreshing us. After the water, He reset His Holy Spirit fire on top of the water. The water was keeping the fire a flame and the fire was keeping the water alive and that's what was keeping us alive. He so clearly showed me that He wants the burning process to be the sacrifice part. He wants me to completely die to myself so that He can then come and pour His living water and reset His fire and make us alive again. Right after I had this vision, the worship leader started singing in the spirit about the fire.
A process is something that takes time. This burning process is going to take some time. He is so incredibly jealous for us that He wants every single fiber of our being to belong completely to Him. He's willing to burn us of ourselves so that we can belong to Him and Him alone. I want His fierce and fiery love to consume everything about me. His living water is what I want flowing in and through me at all times. I want to be a river for Him and drink from His well. Imagine the living water and the Holy Spirit fire flowing and burning together in one person. I have no idea what that even looks like but that's what He told me He's doing in me and Lorraine. I know it's going to be amazing. It already blows my mind to think about the water keeping the fire burning and the fire keeping the water alive and both of them keeping us alive. That picture is forever in my mind and heart.
After 10 days of the burning process, the living water broke through and put the fire out! I felt him submerging me in his new life and making me alive again. The last week of Harvest School, we had a baptism day. I really felt the Holy Spirit telling me that He wanted to baptize me and he wanted me to symbolize myself laying down my own life, dying to myself, being completely submerged in His living water, and being raised back up in His new life. I've already been baptized when I was younger but I didn't fully understand what it meant. Now that I've totally surrendered myself to Him, I really felt like I needed to show and symbolize what I did in my heart. So that's what I did! I was baptized in the Indian ocean by the Holy Spirit and I've been forever changed.
Bush Bush
The bush bush, is where my heart is...
I went on bush outreach 4 weeks ago but it feels like I just got back yesterday. Time is flying by so fast here in Mozambique. We only have 4 weeks left of school then I'm off to Tete! What in the world.
For those of you who don't know, the bush is just a term for a remote village. When we go on bush outreach, we break into our color groups and drive in big flat bed camion trucks and drive for hours to a remote mud hut village and share Jesus with everyone.
My color group (royal blue) went with Heidi Baker's team so we had the privilege of going on the same outreach with Mama Heidi. We drove to our village, set up a big screen and played the Jesus film and drew a huge crowd. Mama Heidi preached and we did a healing service. A few of the young Iris boys came on the outreach with us and they all gave words of knowledge for people that needed healing. That night a woman who was completely deaf, got healed and could hear perfectly! Several village people confirmed that she was deaf before and after Heidi prayed for her, she could hear everything! Hallelujah Hosanna!
The whole weekend was so amazing getting to know the harvest school students and Mozambican pastors in my color group better. Also, a couple of my friends that I met here last year were on my team as well:)
The next day we broke into smaller groups and prayer walked through the village and stopped at several houses and sat and prayed with people in the red dirt. I was in a group with 5 people. We had a Brazilian with us who speaks Portuguese and English, and a moz pastor who speaks Portuguese and Maccoua (local language) so we were able to communicate with people really well. We went to one house and just sat with a mama and her kids and loved on them. It's all about stopping for the one and simply loving.
Then we went to another house where there was an older mama sitting outside her house in the dirt. We went over and sat with her and told her who we were and asked if she needed prayer for anything, she said she wanted prayer for healing. Her body ached all the time and she could barely stand up and walk without pain. Also she was blind in one eye. So we prayed for her for a while, she tested it out and said the pain was still there. The people in my group started to pray again but I stopped them and wanted to talk to the mama for a minute. I asked her if she knew Jesus and if she believed that He can heal her and I explained the whole healing process to her. She said yes yes I believe!! So then we prayed for her muscles and every part that was aching and commanded healing to come in the Name of Jesus. After we were done praying, she stood up and started dancing around and singing and laughing and crying! She was totally totally healed! We celebrated forever and sang worship songs. She said that the eye that was completely blind, was completely healed too and we forgot to even pray for her eye but Jesus still touched it! He is SO good! Then she accepted christ into her heart, and her friend saw the whole thing and she wanted to accept Jesus too.
There are countless stories from this bush outreach that I could share. The chief of the village accepted Christ and we all stayed in tents in his back yard. Mama Heidi bought land to build an iris church, she made plans to build a school and drill a well for water as well. So many things happened and the whole weekend was incredible. It's so humbling going to a village and sharing the simple love of Jesus and leading people to Him.
The bush has stolen my heart every time I've gone. The children just want to be loved and it's the cry of my heart to be able to love them like Jesus does.
I went on bush outreach 4 weeks ago but it feels like I just got back yesterday. Time is flying by so fast here in Mozambique. We only have 4 weeks left of school then I'm off to Tete! What in the world.
For those of you who don't know, the bush is just a term for a remote village. When we go on bush outreach, we break into our color groups and drive in big flat bed camion trucks and drive for hours to a remote mud hut village and share Jesus with everyone.
My color group (royal blue) went with Heidi Baker's team so we had the privilege of going on the same outreach with Mama Heidi. We drove to our village, set up a big screen and played the Jesus film and drew a huge crowd. Mama Heidi preached and we did a healing service. A few of the young Iris boys came on the outreach with us and they all gave words of knowledge for people that needed healing. That night a woman who was completely deaf, got healed and could hear perfectly! Several village people confirmed that she was deaf before and after Heidi prayed for her, she could hear everything! Hallelujah Hosanna!
The whole weekend was so amazing getting to know the harvest school students and Mozambican pastors in my color group better. Also, a couple of my friends that I met here last year were on my team as well:)
The next day we broke into smaller groups and prayer walked through the village and stopped at several houses and sat and prayed with people in the red dirt. I was in a group with 5 people. We had a Brazilian with us who speaks Portuguese and English, and a moz pastor who speaks Portuguese and Maccoua (local language) so we were able to communicate with people really well. We went to one house and just sat with a mama and her kids and loved on them. It's all about stopping for the one and simply loving.
Then we went to another house where there was an older mama sitting outside her house in the dirt. We went over and sat with her and told her who we were and asked if she needed prayer for anything, she said she wanted prayer for healing. Her body ached all the time and she could barely stand up and walk without pain. Also she was blind in one eye. So we prayed for her for a while, she tested it out and said the pain was still there. The people in my group started to pray again but I stopped them and wanted to talk to the mama for a minute. I asked her if she knew Jesus and if she believed that He can heal her and I explained the whole healing process to her. She said yes yes I believe!! So then we prayed for her muscles and every part that was aching and commanded healing to come in the Name of Jesus. After we were done praying, she stood up and started dancing around and singing and laughing and crying! She was totally totally healed! We celebrated forever and sang worship songs. She said that the eye that was completely blind, was completely healed too and we forgot to even pray for her eye but Jesus still touched it! He is SO good! Then she accepted christ into her heart, and her friend saw the whole thing and she wanted to accept Jesus too.
There are countless stories from this bush outreach that I could share. The chief of the village accepted Christ and we all stayed in tents in his back yard. Mama Heidi bought land to build an iris church, she made plans to build a school and drill a well for water as well. So many things happened and the whole weekend was incredible. It's so humbling going to a village and sharing the simple love of Jesus and leading people to Him.
The bush has stolen my heart every time I've gone. The children just want to be loved and it's the cry of my heart to be able to love them like Jesus does.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Enough Time to Love
This is the first time I've been able to post a blog since I've been in Mozambique! So much has happened and The Lord has been moving in and through me in huge ways. I could write a billion blogs on all the stories that have happened so far but I really feel like for right now I'm supposed to share a prophetic word that one of my sisters gave me yesterday. I will write out stories and share testimonies of stuff that's happened here but for right now, I just want to share this with you!
This is from my house mate in Harvest School, Jessica.
"I see you walking along a road. It was a road of gold and the glory of The Lord caused everything to be very bright. As you walked down the road there were people standing on the side watching you. They said nothing but they looked longingly at you. As you walked I saw you stop for each person. You didn't see their circumstances, but you saw their eyes. You saw their longing and you saw their worth. I saw you stepping down off the road to look into their eyes. I saw you take their faces in your hands and smile I to their souls. I saw you speak life and extend to them the hand of acceptance. When you got back on the path of gold you did not go alone. But you see them up to walk along the path with you. No matter how many people you brought onto the path,, you always stopped for the next face and took them up too. As life continued, the demands of life on your time increased. As you rose into authority and responsibility people's expectations of you increased and you were pressured by the outside to be driven by time and appointment rather than by the eyes of the people alongside the road. But in this vision I saw a promise planted in your heart that kept you from submitting to the demands that would take you away from the longing eyes. That promise for The Lord is that you will ALWAYS HAVE ENOUGH TOMR TO LOVE. He is the god of all time and circumstances and he is the love of those with longing eyes. The beautiful thing about this vision is that you were so intent on the people along the road that you were completely unconcerned with the effects of your smile and hand of acceptance. At the end of your golden road was Jesus welcoming you into heaven. Delight rose in his eyes and he asks you to turn around before venturing further with him. When you turned around you saw for the first time the effect of each stop you made. When you looked back there was a multitude... Millions of people standing with joy filled faces. The longing that had resided in their eyes web you see them was replace with glory, joy, as abundant life. Also you remembers every single name of all the people. You may have only met them once but you remembers their face and name. With tears of joy you turned back to Jesus to see tears of joy streaming down his face too. He took your face in his hands and said well done my good and faithful servant. With you I am well pleased. You have honored me an have brought great joy to my heart. Come, let's spend eternity beyond the veil."
This pretty much says it all, but this is the cry of t heart! Stop for the one and love them no matter what their circumstances are. Remember their name and face. You never know the effect you have on people. Love deeply and unconditionally.